Proverbs 15:23. To make an apt answer is a joy to a man, and a word in season, how good it is!
You likely don’t use the word apt very much, and neither do I. Apt answers are well thought out. The person who thinks before they speak uses apt words. Apt words are said so that others will want to listen to you. They are persuasive without being deceptive. Apt words are never impulsive or thoughtless. They are not negative or insulting. Rather they bring joy to the hearer.
Just as important as our words being apt is the timeliness of our words. Words in season. The wise person knows not only what to say, but when to say it. Some things need not be said at all. Other things are best said in private. Giving advice to someone in sorrow may not be the best timing. “I told you so” after a failure is not likely to sit well. Serious conversations while exhausted are likely to be unproductive. Giving others time and space before talking things through can be quite wise. Remember, your season for talking may not be their season for talking.
Apt and timely words carry us way beyond the law’s demand to simply tell the truth. Our words can be true but not apt and not timely. In Colossians, Paul tells the church to speak words that are “gracious and seasoned with salt.” Not just true words, but words spoken in such a way that make others want to hear more.
The other day a friend of mine told me that another Christian had recently been very blunt and abrasive with him. She felt the need to criticize him without any grace or “salt.” When he gently pushed back at her tone, she said something like “I’m sorry, but this is just the way I talk.” How foolish.
If you want your words to bring joy to others make sure that they are thought out, sensitive, caring, and spoken at the right time. This takes much practice, and intentionality. It also takes great faith. Faith in our union with Christ. Christ in us is calling for apt words spoken in season. Are we letting the flesh choose our words, or, in faith, are we letting the Spirit of Christ speak through us?
Why do we speak without thinking, or speak out of turn, or without grace? Why are our words often so negative? The bottom line is because we lack faith in Christ, and his love. Apt words fail us because we are selfish and want to be heard more than we want to love. Sometimes we talk out of season because we are impatient, or scared, and feel like we must say what we want to say in order to protect ourselves. Or maybe the devil has convinced us that “this is just how I talk.”
But the more we trust in Jesus and his love for us the less selfish, impatient, and scared we will be. Listening to Jesus in faith will teach us to listen to others in love. And when we learn to listen to Jesus and to others more than we talk, well then our words will be apt words, spoken in season, bringing grace to the hearer.
You: How would you grade your words in aptness and timeliness?
You in Christ: How does faith in Christ have the power to change our words? Are you experiencing a change in how you talk to and about others?
Christ in you: How can you intentionally speak joy into someone’s life today?
Pray: Spirit, help my words to be apt and timely. Help me to always think before I speak. I want my words to bring joy not sadness to others. Amen.
To Live is Christ 