Proverbs 11:13. Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets, but he who is trustworthy in spirit keeps a thing covered.
The word slandering here is translated as “gossip” in the NIV. This is a person who is not just indiscreet with secrets, but someone who intentionally tries to hurt others by revealing their secrets to others. To slander is to speak against someone. What is being said might be true or it might be false, either way it is meant to work against the person you are talking about.
Why do we do this? Why do we tell the secrets of others? Why do we gossip? Why do we speak against others? We live in a world that loves this kind of slander. It loves hearing and telling secrets about others. Why?
One reason may be because it makes us look and feel superior to the person we are talking about. Usually talking about others makes us feel better about ourselves. In the flesh, we are bent toward self-justification. We naturally feel we must prove that we are better than everyone else. One of the easiest ways to do this is to make others look worse than us. Thus we slander, we gossip, we tell tales.
By contrast the wise person is trustworthy. They end the cycle of self-righteous slandering by holding on to information that could be used against someone else. The wise person keeps things covered. When they are personally offended or know of a sin in a brother or sister’s life, they go to them one on one, in private, like our Lord Jesus taught us. Or whenever possible they allow love to cover over a multitude of sins as they trust the Holy Spirit to be at work in the believer’s life.
God hates gossip, and so must we. We must learn to hate gossip more than we love ourselves. In rejecting gossip, we are loving others. Loving with the love of Christ who never slanders, never gossips, and never uses information against us. Jesus never talked about someone behind their backs. He looked them in the eye and said what needed to be said. He confronted without gossip or slander. With the proud sinner he boldly called out their wickedness. With the humble sinner he gently corrected their perspectives and behaviors. All directly. All face to face. And that is still how he is guiding you – directly through his indwelling Spirit, personally, gently, always from love for your good.
In Christ, we no longer need to slander others to feel good about ourselves. When you know you are raised to life in Christ you never have to drag others down again. When you know how covered you are by the grace of God in Christ you never have to uncover another person’s secrets again. Rather when love requires confrontation, you can go directly and personally to others to seek their repentance. And when love requires overlooking an offense, you can bury it in the depths of the deepest sea without spreading it around as a means of crushing your offenders spirit.
You: Do you expose other’s shortfalls for your own sake, or do you keep things covered in love and mercy?
You in Christ: Why does the person in Christ never have to make themselves look and feel superior to others?
Christ in you: Is there a person you tend to slander (spread negative reports about)? How can you reverse course and restore a relationship with this person?
Pray: Father, by your grace in Jesus help me to stop harming others with my gossip. Instead, help me to build others up by the Spirit. Amen.
To Live is Christ 