Proverbs 31:1-2. 1The words of King Lemuel. An oracle that his mother taught him: 2What are you doing, my son? What are you doing, son of my womb? What are you doing, son of my vows?
The last chapter of Proverbs comes to us from a king named Lemuel. But look closely again at what the first verse says. Whose thoughts are we actually reading in Proverbs 31? These are Lemuel’s mother’s thoughts. Proverbs 31 is an oracle that a mother taught to her son in order to guide him throughout his life and reign.
In ancient times the mother of a king was a pretty big deal. She was called the Queen Mother. In most kingdoms, the Queen Mother actually had a lot of power and influence. Even more than his wife, a king would listen to his mother as one of his closest advisors. The Old Testament story of Bathsheba and her son, Solomon, is a prime example. Without Bathsheba, Solomon never would have been the next king of Israel.
If you were the mother of the king of an empire, if you had his ear and could tell him how to rule and reign, what kind of advice would you give to him? What kind of ruler would you want him to be? Would you have the courage to confront your son? That’s how Proverbs 31 begins, with an affectionate yet powerful rebuke – What are you doing? Three times she asks this question, and with each asking she strengthens her authority. You are MY son. You are my natural born son of my womb. You are the son I committed to the Lord God – son of my vows. And the way you are ruling is breaking my heart.
Maybe you are reading this devotional this morning with a broken heart. A broken heart caused by the way your adult child has chosen to live. Lemuel’s mother will go on to expose his drunkenness and womanizing. She appeals to his sense of duty as a king.
Proverbs 31:3-5. 3Do not give your strength to women, your ways to those who destroy kings. 4It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine, or for rulers to take strong drink, 5lest they drink and forget what has been decreed and pervert the rights of all the afflicted.
Don’t forget who you are King Lemuel, my son. King Lemuel, whose name means “belonging to God.” A king must not live for themselves, using their power to satisfy their own appetites, but for God and his people.
Parents, don’t be afraid to seek an impact on your adult children’s lives. Especially if they are a Christian, don’t be afraid to appeal to who they are in Christ – belonging to God. We can’t control our adult children, and we sure can’t change them, only Christ can do that, but we are still an instrument of God to gently guide and encourage our children even in adulthood. Keep reminding them of who they are in Christ. Remind them of your unconditional love for them. And when their lifestyle becomes cruel and dangerous to others as King Lemuel’s had, don’t be afraid to confront that behavior. Not as a hypocrite, but as a sister or brother in Christ.
You: Do you have a “King Lemuel” in your family? How have you been internally and externally approaching that?
You in Christ: How does our shared union with Christ allow us to confront one another when behaviors become harmful to others?
Christ in you: Are there any difficult conversations that you need to have with one of your children? How can you approach it with gentleness, humility, and not hypocrisy?
Pray: Father, help me to parent my children, even my adult children with all the grace and love with which you parent me. Amen.
To Live is Christ 