Proverbs 26:18-19. 18Like a madman who throws firebrands, arrows, and death 19is the man who deceives his neighbor and says, “I am only joking!”
This happened to me recently. My wife and I went to a little café together for breakfast. After looking at the menu for a while I finally said, “I’ll have the Ham Scram Jam Sam (the name of the breakfast sandwich that I wanted). The man behind the counter looked at me and said, “We’re all out of Ham Scram Jam Sam.” “Oh no,” I literally cried. Then the man said, “I’m only joking, we have the Ham Scram Jam Sam.” Now I’m not saying that this café worker was like a mad man who throws firebrands, arrows, and death. But it was pretty annoying.
The point of today’s proverb is that if we want to be wise, we will have to be careful with how we speak to others. And one of the most important ways to be careful with our speech is in the area of humor. We need to make sure that what we think is funny is actually funny. Humor at another person’s expense is not funny. Telling lies or insulting others, then trying to cover it up by saying I’m only joking, doesn’t change the fact that it was a lie you told, or an insult you gave. Jokes can easily cross the line. Humor becomes hateful with one wrong word. Not to mention all the variables involved in humor. The time. The place. The audience.
Too many of us have gotten into a bad habit of saying whatever we feel like and then afterwards trying to do damage control. Often we even turn it around on our victims – what’s the matter, can’t you take a joke? Wisdom, however, thinks before it speaks. Wisdom stops the “joke” before it comes out, especially if there is any hint of it hurting another person’s feelings.
The deeper issue in our proverb is deception. We aren’t just being sarcastic, rude, or insulting and then excusing it as a joke. Now, we are actively deceiving or manipulating, and then trying to pass it off as funny. This person has turned lying into a casual activity. It’s humorous to them. But the proverb calls this person a madman. They throw firebrands. Do you know who else throws firebrands or fiery darts? The Devil.
I’m only joking is just another way to avoid accountability for our actions. This has been our M.O. since the beginning. The woman you gave me made me eat the fruit, said Adam in the garden. Or High Priest Aaron, I threw the gold into the fire and out came this golden calf. Now that’s funny.
In Christ this whole relational operating system can go away. With Jesus do we ever really need to lie? Deceive? Insult? Put others down? Be sarcastic? When we realize the motivation behind all these things is simply selfishness (self-promotion, self-defense, self-indulgence), the answer quickly becomes NO. No, we don’t need to live this way anymore. Faith in Christ and our union with him takes away the need to make ourselves look better or to cover over our lies by reclassifying them as jokes.
Knowing who we are in Christ, our identity in him, our position in God’s grace, should and does remove all need to destroy others. Others who Jesus died for, without deception. Others who Jesus is actively protecting from the Devils firebrands, arrows, and death.
Christian, remember whose side you’re on. Hint: it’s not Satan’s.
You: Do you tend to re-classify your cruelty or lies as jokes?
You in Christ: How can knowing your position in Christ remove the felt need to disparage or deceive others?
Christ in you: Is there a specific person or situation where you need to turn your speech over to Christ?
Pray: Father, help me to be careful with my speech. May it always reflect who I am in Christ. Amen.
To Live is Christ 