Proverbs 23:9. Do not speak in the hearing of a fool, for he will despise the good sense of your words.
There are some people who just won’t listen. They refuse to hear the truth and listen to good advice. These people are what Proverbs calls fools. Fools aren’t just stupid, they’re stubborn. How can you tell when someone is a fool? Because they despise the good sense of your words. They just want to do things their own way all the time. Do you know anyone like this?
Obviously, this proverb can serve as a warning for us. Ask yourself, do I listen to what wise people say? Do I listen to good sense? Especially the good sense of the gospel? But this proverb is primarily warning us, not about being fools ourselves, but about spending too much of our time talking to these stubborn fools.
Jesus said something similar to this in his Sermon on the Mount when he said, “Don’t give your pearls to the swine.” Pigs don’t care that pearls are pearls and very precious. They just trample them into the mud like they do everything else. Some people are this way too. They just ignore good advice and “trample it into the mud.” They don’t care where the good sense comes from, they ignore it anyway because their hearts are hardened.
These are difficult sayings that require much wisdom. As Christians, we obviously want to love everyone with the love of Jesus. We want to encourage and admonish, teach and warn. All things that the New Covenant Christian is called to do in the context of the church community. Hopefully, by God’s grace and the indwelling Spirit, the other believers in your church are open to all such godly confrontation. But the truth remains that there will always be those fools who refuse to listen to good sense. Maybe there’s even been church discipline put into play, as Jesus outlines in Matthew 18. You’ve gone to them alone, you’ve gone to them with two witnesses, and you’ve taken it to the church, and the fool still refuses to heed the warning or repent of the sin.
Then what? Do we just give up on these fools? No. We never give up on someone. But the strategy needs to change. Words and conversations aren’t working. Warnings have been forsaken. It’s time now to stop wasting your breath and turn this person over to themselves. Even over to Satan (1 Cor. 5:5). Paul did this with people he loved and cared for. So did Jesus. At some point even Jesus couldn’t convince Judas to listen. He had become the worst kind of fool. The stubborn fool. Jesus had to let Judas go (What you do, do quickly). Then Satan entered Judas and you know the rest of the story.
Setting this kind of boundary with the fool can only be done from the Spirit of Christ. Our motivation must never be frustration, vengeance, or anger. Just as God gives the fool up to their own desires out of love, we can do the same in Christ. Cutting off the fool can and must be the final act of love. Turning them over to their own path must be done in the hopes of repentance and restoration. Then pray. Never stop praying for them in faith. Pray that Jesus will open up their hearts to truth, even if he has to break their heart to do it.
Remember, no one is beyond God’s love and grace, not even a fool.
You: Do you have any stubborn fools in your life right now?
You in Christ: How does your union with Christ allow you to have love for the fool?
Christ in you: How can Christ help you to know when to stop trying to convince the fool, and when to cut them off and just pray? Think about his example with Judas.
Pray: Father, I don’t ever want to be a stubborn fool that won’t listen to you or your word. Help me to always have an open heart, and help me to know when to stop talking to the stubborn fools in my life, and when to just pray. Amen.
To Live is Christ 