Proverbs 10:18. The one who conceals hatred has lying lips, and whoever utters slander is a fool.
Is there anyone that you hate?
In ancient thinking, when comparing two things, hatred and love exist in dichotomy. If you love one thing in a pair, then you hate the other thing in the pair. You don’t love one and then love the other just a little bit less – you hate it. For example, God said, “Jacob have I loved, and Esau have I hated.” Did God love Esau? Yes. But in comparing how he graciously chose Jacob over Esau the extreme language of love-hate is used. Jesus will use the same extreme language when he tells us that in order to love him we must hate our families. Should we hate our families? Of course not. But when comparing our families to Christ we love one and “hate” the other.
Why are we talking about all this? Because our proverb today tells us that we have a tendency to hate. Not hate the way we might think of it (disdain, despising, contempt), but hate the way the ancients thought about it – anyone who is not loved is hated. We might try to say, “I don’t love her, but I don’t hate her either.” Or, “I don’t hate my enemies, I just stay away from them.”
But in God’s economy, to not love is to hate.
Hatred then is not “everybody else’s sin.” It is your sin, and my sin. Can you embrace that fact that if you are not actively loving, then you are hating?
So what should we do when we feel like we hate someone? When we are really struggling to like another person? Solomon tells us two things we should NOT do.
First, we should not conceal our hatred. This is pretty much the exact opposite of what we tend to do. We hold silent grudges. We stuff our feelings deep inside until they explode or eat away at us from the inside out.
Second, we must never slander others. The fool always tries to make themselves feel better by making their enemy look worse. Obviously this is not loving, nor is it healing for the soul of the hater. It might score points in the moment, but in the long run is dissolves a person’s ability to forgive and give grace, followed by an inability to receive grace.
In Christ there is no room for hatred. Jesus himself condemned the hatred of our enemies, something that was actually looked at as righteous by the religious Jews of his day. A pure man hated the impure. An honorable man shamed the sinner. But Jesus said, “Love your enemies, bless and curse not.” Don’t slander, calling others “fool.” If you do, you are in danger of internal hell fire sweeping through your soul.
James 3:6. And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell.
The perfect love of Christ for his enemies controls us now. Hatred is set to flight. Love prevails, even to the point of loving all equally (differently, but equally), confronting humbly, and encouraging joyfully.
You: Is there hatred toward anyone in your heart (recall our ancient definition).
You in Christ: How does the love of Christ for you compel your love for others, even an enemy?
Christ in you: If you have slandered someone, how can you make it right?
Pray: Father, with you I don’t have to conceal my anger at others and I don’t have to let my anger urn into mean words or actions. With you I can choose to forgive and try to be friends again. Please help me. Amen.
To Live is Christ 