Proverbs 15:1. A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
I remember in my first year of being a schoolteacher there were times when students would get upset and raise their voice toward me. Of course I did exactly what you would expect, I raised my voice right back at them. However, it didn’t take me long to figure out that this strategy wasn’t working; it just stirred up more anger. And so I wrote out today’s proverb on a card and I taped it to my podium – a soft answer turns away wrath. I can honestly say that it worked far better. To match their heightened emotion and raised voice with calm and a soft answer really did tend to bring peace to situations.
What about you? Have you learned to speak softly? Speaking softly doesn’t mean that you agree with everything the other person is saying, nor does it mean you avoid he truth, but it does mean that we are respectful and gentle in our responses and tone. The soft answer is patient and calm. Slow to anger, and literally quiet and peaceful.
I mean has yelling at others actually ever made things better for you? I didn’t think so.
But this proverb isn’t just about our volume levels. It’s also about our intentions. Notice the singular harsh word. This is a thought out word spoken with the intention of wounding another person. This isn’t an impulsive word. It’s a dagger strategically thrust into the soul in order to stir up anger in the other person. It’s pushing someone buttons to get a rise out of them. It’s bringing up that past mistake to embarrass them again. It’s making someone look like a fool in front of others.
It only takes one harsh word to destroy a relationship forever.
One of the most important things union with Christ does for us is to give us the power we need to change our speech habits. Jesus’ words to us are never harsh or anger provoking. Why? Because he knows that he gains nothing from talking to us in anger. And he definitely gains nothing from our anger aimed back at him. Jesus knows that he doesn’t need to gain anything from us. He has nothing to gain and nothing to lose in his relationship with us. And the truth is, neither do we with others. When we have the love of Christ, we have everything. There’s no reason for harshness. No reason to stir up. No reason to plot a verbal attack against a neighbor, worse yet a brother or sister in Christ. In Christ there’s no reason for our speech to be anything but gracious and seasoned with salt (Col. 4:4-5).
You: Do you speak softly? Plot harsh words? Do you know why you do this?
You in Christ: How does our union wit Christ empower us to always use words that build up rather than stir up anger?
Christ in you: Where can you practice soft and gentle answers today?
Pray: Jesus, if you had yelled and insulted you wouldn’t have been able to die for my sins. Thank you for your soft words that brought my salvation. Amen.
To Live is Christ 